Friday, June 6, 2014


Luckily this blog is not just for quilting but rambling as well.  Hence the name of my blog.    So new things in my life. . . . . . . .

I recently found, as no result of my hard work, that I have a sister.  I won't use the word half sister cause I think there is no such thing.  Someone can't be half of your family.  However since my mom passed away I have learned a hard lesson - family isn't all it's cracked up to be and sometimes you're better off without them.  So once I learned about Jill and started talking to her it was such a welcome surprise to have someone that's family and appears to be just a nice person not out to cheat and hurt people.

Like I said, I can't take credit for finding her as she put all the work into finding her family that led her to me. First thing I thought was do I want to subject her to the two siblings I have.  Would it turn out to just be one more person they make miserable?  Then I realized she isn't related to my other sister and I will let her decide about the brother.

It's funny how prayers get answered and you weren't really sure what you were praying for?  Since all the stuff with my mom's death and the behavior of my siblings, I have just decided it's in the best interest of my health (mental and physical) to walk away and let them work out the issues and results of their decisions. The funny part is family has always meant so much to me and I've struggled for a very long time wondering why they don't feel the same, almost to the point I pressure them to be family like and it makes relationships worse.    So it was hard to just turn away and pretend I have no family.  Had accept it's time to stop helping people that feel you're nothing and realize family doesn't mean much to some people and you can't change that.  I should interject here that I have a second set of what I like to call second parents that bring so much love and caring into my life.  I've known Nancy and Kerry since I was around 8 and they have always been so caring, like I was their child almost.  

I thought it was weird one night I realized I was praying and asking God why I couldn't have a normal loving family.  Why couldn't he make my family care.  Then I heard from Jill and never connected the two till someone said to me the other day . . .didn't you ask God for a normal family?  Isn't she kinda what you asked for?  Wow that was a heavy revelation.  Between this and my second parents, I have a real family.

I have corresponded with her several times and look forward to getting to know her and eventually meeting her.  She has put so much effort into finding family that I hope the ones she finds bring many blessings to her life.   She has told me more about my dad and his family than my mom would.  

She was kind enough to send me a picture of her and her husband. She's certainly a beautiful woman but I wouldn't post her pic without hr permission.  Once I ask if she approves I'll add it.

All in all what I have learned in 5 short months?  Friends are family you get to choose and there are normal families out there as well as we all have to pick and choose who we allow in our lives.

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